The etiquette surrounding engagements and the big day can be kind of complex and confusing. Saying thank you and congratulations never goes out of style though and sending out wedding cards is one of the best ways to let a couple know you’re thinking of them.

If you’re stuck on figuring out what exactly they’re all about and what the etiquette is when it comes to sending them out, then you’re in the right place. Read on below to find out about what you should consider when it comes to well-wishes and some suggestions for how to write them.

Why should you send wedding cards?

An engagement or recent ceremony is one of the most exciting times in a couples lives and calls for heartfelt congratulations. The well-wishes of friends and family are things to treasure for newlyweds and a way of showing your sincere appreciation and thanks for your invitation to attend their celebration.

Sending out your well-wishes is important etiquette and shows that you care for the couple. Weddings cards are the most elegant way to communicate your thoughts and should follow the lead of the style and level of formality of the marriage proceedings.

Things to consider

When choosing your wedding cards you should give thought to the personality and taste of the special couple, there is stationary out there to suit everybody. Finding something that is a personal nod to the couple will show them how much you care.

If there was a theme on their big day, a colour palette that suits them or something in keeping with their interests then selecting your stationary based on this is a good idea.

What you write inside is every bit as important as the choice of wedding cards itself, the tone and wording of your congratulations should follow the style and level of formality of the couples communications.

If their engagement announcement or their big day was a casual affair it might not be appropriate to send them an overly formal reply, you risk missing the mark and coming off as stuffy.

If they have been formal in their communications then formal etiquette should be followed, you might come across as rude otherwise. Formal affairs involve a lot of effort on behalf of the couple, if this effort is reciprocated it is always appreciated by the couple.

What to write on wedding cards

So what kinds of things should you write in your wedding cards? A personal approach is always best, but there are some common well-wishes and templates you can follow when sending your congratulations to the couple.

If it’s formal

Formal phrasing is timeless and never goes out of style. You should address the card to the couple with their new titles (Mr. and Mrs. Smith for example). Common well-wishes include “wishing you a lifetime of love and happiness” and “Thank you for letting us share in your day. Our blessings for the future of your union”.

If it’s casual

If it’s casual, keep your reply personal and light-hearted. Mentioning something specific to the couple or their big day is always appreciated – the day flies by so quickly, recorded details of the day are always a thoughtful touch! “Best wishes on your big day!” and “Congratulations!” are appropriate, as is “Thanks for inviting me along to your big day, we had a wonderful time and especially enjoyed the lemon cake!’”.

If they’re family

If they’ve just joined the family then it’s always a good idea to make them feel welcome, include a “welcome to the family!” note in your well-wishes.